Wives at sea

[James Curry]

Did anyone ever sail with onboard wives at sea be it their own wive or someone elses?
I have sailed with many, as well with female officers be they deck , engine or radio offiecers.
More often than not they accepted they had entered a mans world and got on with most onboard.
As officers and crew wives were generally treated with respect and female officers were also treated with respect as long as they did their best and got on with the job.
At times in the smoke room / bar someone would let slip the odd swear word and on ocassion you might get pulled up on it if you did it again.
We had a captain Murdoch and her husband she was a pain in the a-se as she thought she wore the cap with the scrambled egg.
She was forever interferring with trying to run the ships social life. Best one though was one night on the 8/12 watch the 3rd mate pulled up a chair beside the old man in the bar, himself was 1/2 a bottle of Bells in. Old man does a double take and asks who is on the bridge? Your wife I have had enough of her playing around with the radars. Never seen Murdoch move so fast. Captain Murdoch had her off in the next port!! he had a choice she went or we did.
Always found two wives onboard or four no problems. 3 wives and there has been an atmosphere 2 v 1.
Always remember we had a lovely old chief who was approaching retirement, his wife was liked by everyone but she would say , John think it was time we went up as these young lads will be wanting to enjoy themselves with out us two sitting here all night.

Just read that again be it their own wive or someone elses?
We had a guy ETO, who had his new wife onboard not long married so explained why her passport was not in her married name.
Tish hit the fan big time. Old man had an email from the office, can you confirm that the ETO does not have his wife onboard ? Turns out his real wife had been phoning the office to see when her husband was coming home. Oh dear an own goal or what.

[Doc Vernon]

Hi James
Naught wrong here just that there is or was another Thread of the exact same name at one time ?
Dont know where it is , will have to look for it!
Cheers


James just looked it up and actually it is not exactly the same Title but on the same Topic.
No worries though.
Cheers


Women crew members and wives at sea. (merchant-navy.net)

[Ken Atkinson]

Wives at Sea
The number of wives mentioned even good odd bad is not the problem but with females on board whether wives or crew there is always a dynamic but with my wife having spent time as a stewardess on the ferry to Norway and then on five of the ships with me I feel able to comment. Even one female produces a civilising effect on a bunch of young male animals and usually is given the job of Entertainments Officer.
In our first year of marriage just before Christmas 1971 as one of the Junior Engineers at Greenwell’s dry-dock in Sunderland, we went on a rota for spending the night aboard even though it was a dead ship with nothing running and a toilet block on the dock side. My wife kept me warm one cold night in a cabin next to the door on deck but were glad that other days we could catch the Newcastle bus and get off at Felling where we lived. The next trip was nine and a half months and my wife had been there for eight and a half months. Even with my wife on board I did not consider this was the best way of treating company contract officers so I left for exams and a better employer.
An officer change including my wife and myself joined 1974 in Houston. From there across the Mexican Gulf to Tampa in Florida to load phosphate for Visakhapatnam on the East coast of India a long way and five weeks away via Durban in South Africa for bunkers. Iron ore from there to Japan and loaded steel products at Wakayama Leaving ship, night in a Tokyo hotel then flight via Anchorage Alaska after a civilised four and a half months. After a few years of an extended family of shipmates I observed bad decisions with ships being sold and then managed again it was exam time and another change of family.
The next trip involved both of us joining in Holland, picking up salt in Tunisia where the two wives were helped down a ladder like descending the gable end of a house and on to the Souk. From there to Boston MA where my wife hired a car with my card, the R/O his driving licence and the 3/O to visit Mystic Seaport Museum except for me working. After loading we went to New Zealand where we were shown the sights and were given a “hangi” feast. We flew home from Sydney, a long way via Singapore and Bahrain with little to recommend it especially since she was affected with DVT although we did not realise at the time. Her final voyage with me was from Antwerp to Bankok via the Panama Canal and back to Houston then Philadelphia having collected enough sea-time for two exams. She was escorted to the airport by a Federal Marshall.
On one ship we had a first trip junior radio officer married to the second mate who thought the third mate should swop cabins with her so they could have a suite only the captain said no. She used to introduce herself as Second Radio Officer while the rest of us corrected it to, junior and very junior at that. The company rule was for children under five the wife had to be a nurse and we became an extended family. It was a fascination in rough weather where we had to hang on to something and beer in the other while small child walked across as though we were tied up in port. In Catalonia it is legally acceptable to be topless in swimming pools but the captain told me my wife had to keep her top on in our pool. Some wives came only for a short time as holidays or access allowed and it was always educational to everyone as different to our enclosed society. One worked in a dog testing laboratory while another, a doctor from London was horrified that a Welsh junior from the valleys went “lamping” poaching after the pubs shut and shot his dog for not working.
The Catering Department feature next with two stewardesses working together in each cabin ignoring their boss and a steward calling everyone sweetie. On another ship “captain’s tiger” used to arrive the following port like an old married couple only the wife was still at home. My wife was with her and the 2nd cook having a drink in a hotel while they admired a member of a film crew but were warned off by the 2nd cook who declared he was for him and so it was. Another was a grandma who had returned to earn money for her grandchild but also mothered the rest of us. Several wives and one toddler were on the last ship but as mother and toddler came on with the 4th they left with the 3rd. As we were in Bankok for about three weeks we all saw many wonderful things. Before meals we gathered in the bar only to find some of the seats were occupied by “Thai Wives.” I was expected to order them out but refused as I would then have upset the other officers. The only local whom everyone liked was half Scottish and catered for us all with stir-fry at the “Poop Café.” I conclude that while there can be problems overall it was a good thing in the seventies until the MN collapsed.

[Ken Atkinson]

My wife was able to interact with others where we could not by sharing make-up or western clothing. A female Lithuanian stevedore responded with a piece of amber jewellery. In India a hotel manager invited both of us to his house for a meal and sent his servant to tell his wife to prepare. Although she spoke little in our presence the next day, they visited the ship where my wife took her to our cabin. Here she opened-up and made friends taking my wife later to buy a couple of saris and tops at local Indian prices and teaching how to wear them. The hotel “belly dancer” from one of Russia’s Stan countries was also made friends with and a couple of items donated for my amusement. While Australia and New Zealand have always been known for being friendly the presence of a wife attracted more invitations social and tourist if not exotic.

[Alan Briggs]

There were many "wives" on the Kiwi coast and a few Maori Princesses!!.

[James Curry]

Any truth in the rumour that on the likes of the Port Line ships It was not unheard of for the entertainment to join at the first port of call and get off at the last port, suppose really it was a Board of Trade marriage.
Funniest one I witnessed was the Skipper had a girl friend on a coaster. She would join at a load port , think it was Par in Cornwall loading China clay for some port on the Siene. We discharged and loaded some place else for gthe UK. Think it was Goole. Anyway as we berthed there was a fella on the quay. The husband, not best pleased to say the least.If you plough the field best you have an ocean between you and home lol

[j.sabourn]

In 1955 Gaynor supposedly from port line offices in Auckland used to phone the ship and bring her office girls down to the ship for a party. Her own particular prey was first trippers. Story went she had been married to a Norwegian seaman at one time. They were not ship travellers as never saw them at sea which makes me believe they were actually from Port Line offices her and her girls and had jobs to go to next morning. JS

[Captain Kong]

On one tanker I was on an engineers wife worked her way down the Firemens alleyway. she was always drunk.
On Xmas day there was a party in the saloon, I came off the bridge at midnight and went into the saloon, got a beer and looked around and there was a Fireman having a Knee trembler with her against the bulkhead, both legs around his waist.
I said to the engineer, Have you seen your wife? he says Yes, but what can you do with a wife like that. it was pathetic. I went to my cabin.

Another tanker I was on and the 3rd Mates wife was bang at it, their cabin was next to mine. Every time she heard my shower go she always walked into my cabin I used to throw her out. I didnt want to know her.
On the wing of the bridge one night I saw a dress flapping in the breeze in the shade off the lifeboat, I got the Aldis Lamp and shone it down there, It was her she ran to the door of the accomodation and the Chief Engineer fell on the deck, his big fat ass shining in the light
with his shorts round his ankles.
A few nights later I saw a skirt from the back of the funnel, [same deck as the wheelhouse]I gave the AB a torch and I got the Aldis again , we went round the funnel and both of them were having a knew trembler, They both fell down the ladder and disapeared into the accomodation
When we got to Dubai, the3rd Mate and I were Paying off and got into the boat. I asked him, where was the wife? he says, She is staying on with the Chief Engineer, I only brought her with me to get rid of her.
So best not to get involved

Brian

[James Curry]

Well yes the odd one did stray but most I sailed with just enjoyed the trip and the time with their husbands.

[j.sabourn]

#8 That’s why I never liked women on a ship Brian they could cause more trouble than enough. One ship I was on the 3 and 4 engineers went off the ship at the end of the voyage left with different partners . The other women on board were well respected and kept clear of such . But one can’t pick and choose who you carry , or their morals. Just class all the same and go back in time to what it used to be. All women including wife’s off the ship at sun down in port . A lot of the ports in uk used to enforce this in any case , Hull was one of them .JS